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A little Illustration that I'd like to update and improve

Hi all! As a follow up on the community hangout today I'm posting some older artwork. This is a card created from an illustration that I drew several years ago. I made the patterned papers in the background to match it, and I'm fairly happy with those, and I like the vintage-y feel of the little girl, but there's definitely room for improvement and I'd love some feedback.

This was digitally drawn and colored with a mouse, and I think that it's a tiny bit stiff, and the flowers might be a bit awkward in her hands. The shading is a bit off - the dots were a brush I tried to create myself with no pressure sensitivity tools, so that's a clear area for improvement. The part that I think most needs help is the face, which just isn't quite right (though I'm not sure precisely what isn't working for me). I'm ready to start again with the tools I have at hand now, and I'd love some feedback from all of you on what could be done to improve her!

Comments

  • JemJem Posts: 933 Champion

    @Barbara.A - I don't know if this helps at all, but the first thing I thought when I looked at her was that she looked a little stooped. Then I realised it was because I couldn't see her neck. I think adding her neck in there would help :)

    That aside - it's a lovely little illustration!

    Photographer | Graphic Designer | Cat Mum | Film Watcher | Music Listener | Yorkshire Lass

    Instagram: @shutterjunkie | Twitter: @photographerjem

  • Barbara.ABarbara.A Posts: 706 mod

    Thanks so much, Jem! Yes, you're right! The inspiration for this was a photo (my grandmother as a toddler), and I think she might have been hunched up a bit in it. A neck would be a great improvement. :)

  • ClaudiaClaudia Posts: 1,931 Champion

    @Barbara.A that's your grandma? aaaaaaw how precious

  • andrikoandriko Posts: 56 Enthusiast

    @Barbara.A sweet little card and as Jem mentioned, a neck will make a big improvement. May I add my 2cts? I'd exchange the red blossoms on the right side with some white margarits which a slight green touch like those -> click

    Taking the arrangement of the red flowers, try to exchange position so that the bigger one is below and underneath the smaller one.
    Looking forward to your improvements. And thank you for sharing

  • Barbara.ABarbara.A Posts: 706 mod

    Thanks, Andriko! The comments on the card design are spot on. I think the white daisies would look fantastic with the colors of the card. I need to plant some next year and press them!

  • bijutohabijutoha Posts: 17 Fan

    Skillfully or proficiently, a good design. @Barbara.A

  • BiggiBiggi Posts: 46 Enthusiast

    I think this is a really sweet card @Barbara.A

    I hope it’s ok to add my thoughts to everyone else’s. I’m finding the shadows a little inconsistent. It looks like the big oval has a slight shadow to the right whereas the round ‘A cheery hello’ is to the bottom left. That makes it a little confusing to the eye. I would also try to not add a shadow to the girl to make her sit ‘in’ the oval, like a drawing rather than slightly floating above unless of course that’s the effect you want. Instead I would add a shadow to the large flowers on the right to lift them up and enhance the fact that they sit on top of the rest. Does that make sense?

  • Richard LyallRichard Lyall Posts: 1,187 mod

    @Biggi said:
    I think this is a really sweet card @Barbara.A

    I hope it’s ok to add my thoughts to everyone else’s. I’m finding the shadows a little inconsistent.

    It’s a sweet design.

    Agree about the shadows. A little more consistency in the direction & depth, and adding one to the flowers would help anchor them in the design.

  • Barbara.ABarbara.A Posts: 706 mod

    Ah, the shadow inconsistency is an interesting problem! Some of the shadows are in the illustration, and others are actual shadows from how the card was assembled in layers for depth. I think the girl has 4 or 5 layers in some spots. When I redo the illustration I’ll only be doing the one layer, so hopefully that won’t be an issue.😊

  • Richard LyallRichard Lyall Posts: 1,187 mod

    @Barbara.A said:
    Ah, the shadow inconsistency is an interesting problem! Some of the shadows are in the illustration, and others are actual shadows from how the card was assembled in layers for depth. I think the girl has 4 or 5 layers in some spots. When I redo the illustration I’ll only be doing the one layer, so hopefully that won’t be an issue.😊

    Another thought Barbara ... it looks as if the central part of the design (the girl, flower, and Cheery hello) is a bit right of centre? My eye wanted to move it a bit to the left. But that's just me :)

  • Barbara.ABarbara.A Posts: 706 mod

    Yes, I really should have hunted up a picture of just the illustration. All I had at hand was one of it displayed on a card! As viewed here it is right of center, and I should have put it MORE right of center so that it was clearly on purpose. I think when I redo the illustration I'll be focusing just on the figure, though. But I'm learning so much about how to make the cards better too, it's a good thing I was too lazy to look for the original.

  • siegbrunn@t-online.de[email protected] Posts: 1 Newbie
    edited January 27

    Hello, Barbara! I'm coming in a bit late here, but I'm reacting to your comment

    _"The part that I think most needs help is the face, which just isn't quite right . . ."
    _
    That was my first reaction as well. By blocking the upper half, then the lower half, for me it seems that the expressions don't fit together quite right. I think the eyes are too sad (or perhaps the smile is too "upturned"? I wanted to say "too happy", but that's not it.)

    In any case, I find your drawing absolutely _charming _and I went off to visit your website. <3 Thumbs up!

  • Barbara.ABarbara.A Posts: 706 mod

    Thanks!! I see what you mean!

  • PamelaPamela Posts: 1 Newbie

    Hi Barbara
    I thought I might comment from the perspective of someone who researches facial expressions (I am a designer on L-plates hoping to escape academia!). First, I love your drawing and only wish I could do something like it! But it could be that the eyes and mouth are not quite showing the same expression as @[email protected] said. For example, the eyebrows and eyes in a happy expression are usually relaxed and the eyes are often not quite so wide open. But in say surprise the eyebrows are up and curved and the eyes wider and the mouth open in O shape. Naturally, this all depends on individual facial features as some people have naturally more arched eyebrows and so on.

    For me, as I look at her I see happiness in her mouth and eyes that makes me smile with her but then I can see a bit of surprise in her eyebrows.

  • Barbara.ABarbara.A Posts: 706 mod

    @Pamela said:

    Hi Barbara
    I thought I might comment from the perspective of someone who researches facial expressions (I am a designer on L-plates hoping to escape academia!). First, I love your drawing and only wish I could do something like it! But it could be that the eyes and mouth are not quite showing the same expression as @[email protected] said. For example, the eyebrows and eyes in a happy expression are usually relaxed and the eyes are often not quite so wide open. But in say surprise the eyebrows are up and curved and the eyes wider and the mouth open in O shape. Naturally, this all depends on individual facial features as some people have naturally more arched eyebrows and so on.

    For me, as I look at her I see happiness in her mouth and eyes that makes me smile with her but then I can see a bit of surprise in her eyebrows.

    I completely see what you're saying. I think the eyebrows are throwing me off a bit too. And what a fascinating thing to research and study! I'm so glad you commented here!

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